A touch of Hades…
When I was young, my nursemaid told me stories of the gods, and how they created and interact with mankind. The tales I think of now are of the land of the dead, Hades. The cold, hidden god with the same name as his underworld, sitting on his stone throne… how he stole Persephone, the daughter of Demeter, the wheat goddess, and was convinced to let her go for the spring and summer alone… how Orpheus traveled down to the underworld, charming all creatures and things with his song, to bring back his lover’s spirit, only to lose her at the last second… how Psyche had to bring back water of the River Styx, the holiest river in creation, to sate Aphrodite’s sadistic challenges…
I know the gods exist, but I don’t know if such an underworld exists… you see, I died recently.
Just before ONI disbanded, I was doing reconnaissance at a cafe near NavKor when I met a young man. He introduced himself as Kazic – we had a brief conversation before I headed back to base, and I didn’t think much of it – my mind was on other things. Not long after ONI disbanded, and Tix and I camped by the lake outside of NavKor, we were approached again by Kazic. At first, after getting his pistol shot out of his hand by Tix, he said he was looking for someone – we offered our assistance, but he declined, and went elsewhere. That evening, I met up with an old friend, Vixen, by the lake. I had Hermes with me, but my gigantic purple tiger suddenly disappeared while I was talking with Vix. Not long after that, I started to hear growls across the lake. Alarmed, I rushed over at top speed, to find Hermes facing off with Kazic, and Tix outside, weapon ready.
Kazic wasn’t talking, so Tix fired a shot into his chest. This angered me – I was not looking to kill anyone, especially since we weren’t soldiers any more. I went over to Kazic’s body, only to find him healing from his wound. A little relieved, I called Hermes over to pin him down, and in that seemingly secure position, Kazic talked. He told us that someone had mentioned bounties on ONI soldier heads, that the money was better than any of us could imagine. Tix, disgusted that I just didn’t kill the guy, went back in the tent. I decided to negotiate – with two threats and a third option. I thought that life would count more than death… but this was not so.
He gripped my wrist, and told me of his second power… to stop the function of organs within a person’s body. Immediately I felt my breath shorten, my heart starting to beat slower. Tix managed to put a temporal dagger into the guy’s throat, threatening to erase him from existence unless he let me go. Kazic refused… and I was dying. The world swam in and out on me, like waves on a shoreline. All rational thought seemed to disappear on me… replaced with a cold, desperate anger. I wanted to live… and if I was to die, I wanted NOT to die alone. As Kazic’s grip grew tighter, I started to petrify him from the feet up. There was no yielding on his part, no matter how Tix threatened or Vixen (who had followed us, invisible) pleaded or bargained. Finally, I reached my breaking point. There were no second chances – Kazic had to die, with or without me. With my last effort, I wrenched free and turned him to stone completely – at the same moment, I felt my heart stop. I remember saying something inane, then falling to the ground.
And then, all was black. No golden god Hermes, to guide my soul. No River Styx. No tortured souls or a cold god overseeing it all. Just… darkness. With maybe murmurs of voices, too far away to be recognizable. A second passed – an eternity passed – then…
I breathed. My heart pounded back into life. I sat up, to find Vixen over me, looking worried, and my beloved tiger cutting furrows into Kazic’s stone face. I was alive… thanks to Tix. Somehow he had sent my body and soul back in time almost an hour – I was thirstier than Tantalus. And I was totally aware of what I had done… it frightened me… it sickened me… it angered me.
I destroyed Kazic’s corpse. I blew it into dust and slivers with my blaster. I did it while weeping, full of horror and remorse and anger about what I had done. The name Kazic will always be with me, because of what happened to both of us. We became killers… we were killed.
The next day, I couldn’t bear what I had done. I couldn’t face Tix, couldn’t face the world. I ran into the forest, weeping again, hopeless, not understanding how I could have done such a thing, against what I had promised before. My tears were stopped and my mind opened when the god Hermes appeared to me. He was glorious… he smiled… but he was firm in his tone. He named me as a hero, but he reminded me that a hero’s path is not one without death. It is something that I have had to learn how to accept. He also praised me for leaving it as the last resort, but cautioned me to value my life more… I took that to heart. I returned to Tix, feeling stronger… but a little older, as well. Perhaps a wrinkle of worry appears on my brow more often.
The events of death are something that I am not going to forget. I know how to save… and I know how to kill. I am willing to do what I can to save my own life… and Tix’s life.
