Coruscant
When I was a mercenary, many years ago, one of the clients who hired me sent me to Coruscant to track down a former contact. On the last day that I was there, I walked past a booth that had little talking Rodians and Cereans saying things like “Can’t say Coruscant without Core!”. Annoying little things…
They still exist. That same booth, same person selling them. He didn’t recognize me, of course, but I was sorely tempted to ask him if the tourist business kept him going. He seemed plenty enthusiastic in terms of getting me to buy something, unlike last time… but last time, I wasn’t exactly… the charming type.
But things are different now. Especially my reasons for being on Coruscant for the past week or so.
Last time I wrote any sort of log, Qui-Gon had moved in to my house on Phren Eirene. Since then, I had the urge to go back to my roots in terms of the gods, since I was, well… the child of one. I wanted to show them that I respected that I was a part of their bloodline, so I began creating sculpture. I had the urge to do extra research on the one I was creating for my father, Poseidon, so I went to NavKor’s library to do so. During that time, Qui-Gon came and found me, but he was preoccupied. It turns out that he had made contact with one of his former Padawans, a Master Jedi named Obi-Wan Kenobi… another famous name from the Jedi Order. Obi-Wan had informed him of the exact state of affairs of the Jedi… how they were all but extinct. Qui-Gon informed me of those details, about his plan to head to Coruscant to meet with Obi-Wan, and about his purpose in reviving the Order, by starting an academy, using the information he could salvage from the ruined Jedi temple on Coruscant. I suggested that he build the academy on Tynnara, but he grew very concerned about the planet’s safety.
I admit… my reasons for suggesting it were selfish. I had been feeling that yes, I had moved on from losing Tix. Although I wasn’t actively pursuing Qui-Gon in any way other than friendship… part of me wanted to. His serenity, his inherent goodness – even Hermes was referring to him as “Good Soul Man” – was just so attractive to me, the polar opposite of the troubled natures of both Tix and Jacen (the latter has been continuously absent from both my island and my life, which is also a relief)… the thought of losing him to such a huge undertaking brought such a chill to my soul. Qui-Gon was right, of course – building a Jedi academy on Tynnara was both foolish and dangerous… but my heart only saw it as The Greater Good, getting in the way of my happiness again. I was so dismayed by my line of thinking, that I started to run – away from Qui-Gon, away from my fears, just away…
The last thing I expected was to be chased. Yet I was chased… and caught. Caught by a Jedi, using the Force to enhance his speed so much that we crashed out of the library, skidding across the ground. It scraped Qui-Gon’s back badly, even with the Force cushioning him, but he held me tightly, so I wasn’t hurt at all. In his arms, startled and emotionally turbulent, I confessed a good deal of what I was feeling… how I felt my heart was going to be broken, yet again… how I didn’t want to lose him. I was astonished to hear him say that he wouldn’t, couldn’t do that… that he wanted to stay with me… I touched his face, scared to even believe that it could be possible that he felt anywhere close to the way I did… and he kissed me. The Jedi Master, Qui-Gon Jinn, kissed me.
After… well, after all that, we finally got ourselves off the ground and headed back to the island. I felt really guilty that I caused him to be wounded – his back had several large gashes where stones must have caught and torn his robes. As soon as we got to the island, I got the first aid supplies and cleaned his wounds, with behot and bacta… and then, maybe because of the euphoria of Qui-Gon’s kiss, maybe for some other unknown reason, I felt that I could do something more. I concentrated on healing his wounds, invoking the gods from my people who stand for medicine… but I didn’t think anything would happen. I offered my services instead as a pilot, to get him to Coruscant, and he agreed happily. We went to our separate rooms, and I headed out early in the morning to secure a ship.
When I got back to Qui-Gon, he told me something very interesting… his wounds had healed, without his own Force healing to bolster it. His thought was that I could be Force-sensitive… a possible Jedi. This was an option I had never considered, even with the abilities that I already had… and an attractive option; it was certainly more attractive to me than my own father’s offer of immortality, which was also proposed to me that day, which I declined. With the mindset that I would become a Jedi, despite whatever odds were set against me/us, we headed to Coruscant together, to wait for Obi-Wan.
The city, full of people… trillions of souls. We blended in just fine, renting out a motel room, seeing some sights, trying new foods like pizza and calzones – Qui-Gon’s reactions to these new foods was astounding and amusing… it was like he’d eaten bland, boring food all his life, and was just discovering the spice of pepperoni, the tang of sauce… for all I know, that was actually the case.
We also took a quick drive over the ruins of the Jedi temple. It evoked some very unhappy feelings in Qui-Gon. Later in our stay, after an encounter with a man in a park showed that I had the capacity to do a Jedi mind trick on someone instinctively, I went to the temple on my own, against Qui-Gon’s wishes, to see what I was getting myself into. I shadow-walked, of course, and wasn’t caught… but the sadness of the place affected me. It was almost as though I could feel the death that had happened within the walls… especially the death of children. Someone who is responsible for the death of children is cursed forever, in my mind.
During the trip back to the motel from that expedition, I happened to look into a shady dive in the lower levels… and found myself looking at my Orion boss, Navaar. Apparently she had a business meeting with certain individuals… but as I watched, the situation grew more ugly, with thugs blocking the only exit to the room. I shadow-walked in, letting Qui-Gon know telepathically what was going on, and when the time was right, sprang out and attacked one of the thugs. Navaar and I both started shooting – me to disarm, her to kill. Qui-Gon showed up quickly and helped us escape, but Navaar was still hurt in the process. Qui-Gon healed her while I got us, in Navaar’s shuttle, back to the motel. She stayed the night in the bed that Qui-Gon and I had been sharing – yes, sharing, and sharing comfortably, nothing inappropriate at all – and the two of us just kind of leaned against the wall together. She left the next morning, and Qui-Gon and I continued to wait for Obi-Wan.
He finally arrived yesterday, after being targeted by Jedi bounty hunters… it’s possible that Qui-Gon and I had been targeted as well, but it also could have been the thugs who went after Navaar – some wires had been cut in the ship Qui-Gon and I traveled in, but not in a way that was complete sabotage. Nevertheless, Qui-Gon and I changed motels and docking bays, and awaited Obi-Wan’s arrival. We planned out our “visit” to the temple’s archives, based on a lot of the reconnaissance I did on my own. We infiltrated the place easily, and, I have to admit, I was somewhat instrumental in getting us into the Archives without bloodshed – Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan distracted the guards between us and the Archives, and I shadow-walked in and turned all the guards to stone – temporary stone, but still stone. There were six of them… and I had never changed six beings in succession before. It wore me out, more than I expected, but I was still able to head into the Archives with the two Jedi. Qui-Gon did some searching on his own, while Obi-Wan went to a terminal and downloaded specific files – mainly, lightsaber forms, Force abilities, and lightsaber schematics.
After we found what we were looking for, I shadow-walked out of the temple on my own… which was a very bad idea. I realized, as soon as I’d cleared the temple limits, that I was flagging fast. All the energy that I’d had on the trip up was gone… I couldn’t even make it all the way to the motel through the shadows. I had to walk out of them, and catch my breath. I commed Qui-Gon to let him know my status, and his reply was almost frantic… it was something I had never really heard in him before, and I told him not to fear. That seemed to calm him, and he came to get me, tracking my comm signal. He almost blinded me with the aircar he rented, and when I told him so, he joked about the Force being used to see – he didn’t understand how important my vision was to me (important enough to name a ship after, yes?), and how it saved us the pain of killing people this time around. I explained, tiredly, and he apologized, looking very contrite. I reassured him that I wasn’t angry, and that if I were blinded, it would mean a great loss in not being able to look into his eyes again – I don’t think he was expecting to hear that.
When I got out of the aircar, my knees gave way – I was really, really exhausted. Qui-Gon scooped me up like I was nothing, and brought me back up to our motel room. Obi-Wan was crashed out, waiting for us to return, slumped in one of the chairs, so Qui-Gon set me on the bed. I wanted to get undressed, because of the filth I had been exposed to after shadow-walking, but he more or less wouldn’t let me. I settled for just getting the uncomfortable things off – boots, weapons, hair bindings – and sleeping in that. He seemed a little hesitant to join me tonight… maybe because of Obi-Wan. He also seemed to discourage the idea of returning to Tynnara… but… we have to. Empire or not, we’re still employed at NavKor. We have to go back.
I wasn’t happy about what he said, and he did promise that we’d come back to NavKor, for certain… he didn’t reach for me, and I thought it was because of Obi-Wan being there… but I didn’t care. I held on to him, and the happiness I sensed from him was all but intoxicating. I almost… well, I almost said something big. Something too big, perhaps. Except… maybe I did, when I was drifting off? I was kind of in a dream then, a good one… and I might have said something out loud. I don’t know… and I don’t know if he would feel the same way.
Despite everything, I’ve learned a lot on Coruscant – about myself, about Qui-Gon, and about the future that’s ahead of us. As long as he is at my side… I think I will face it without fear.
